La Costa Valley’s (Unofficial) Community News & Views

Entries tagged as ‘april fool’s’

State of California overturns decision by City of Carlsbad and High School District

April 1, 2008 · No Comments

California’s Governor announced today that he has taken one more step toward balancing the State’s challenged budget.

As the Governor was passing over Calsbad in a helicopter, he issued the following statement using a specially-designed public address system, “Good people of Carlsbad. Hi! I said I would be back. I want you to know that I care for you little people and will do the best thing I can. I have decided to join you.”

As later explained by an aide, the Governor had been coincidentally scouting for undeloped property for his San Diego area gubernatorial residence. He had made some calls to the City of Carlsbad and discovered that the property was in play. Using his recently-honed political savvy and certain unspecified targeted financial arrangements, he got the City of Carlsbad’s decision overturned on various legal grounds.

The aide added that preliminary investigation revealed that the property would need to be modified somewhat to meet the Governor’s security needs. He hoped that the local residents would embrace the changes.

Security consultants expressed concern that the property must not be lower than surrounding property. So, enough landfill will be brought in to raise the Governor’s mansion to at least 40 feet above any adjacent property. The aide added that having elevated property would only enhance the Valley aspect of La Costa Valley. Also, simply being near the Governor’s mansion would greatly increase property values well beyond anything that might concievably be lost by having an impaired view.

As to the $53.4 million in funds originally to be transferred from the High School District to the FONC group, the Governor’s office will apply part of those funds to a State legal fund. The legal action will seek financial remedy from the original real estate developers of La Costa Valley who had advertised homes with the claim that a middle school would be built in La Costa Valley. The Governer’s special financial analyst has determined that by having the home developers pay to build the school, it would go even further toward balancing California’s budget.

As part of a local stimulus package, the balance of the funds will be awarded to other real estate developers to built the new Governor’s mansion. Additionally, funds will be used to heighten security in the La Costa Valley area, speeding up the upgrade of an antiquated pool security system to a retina-scan/forehead barcode system. Furthermore, for the Governor’s security, suitable fences and gates will be built around La Costa Valley, using a money-saving approach by adopting materials originally designated for the USA-Mexico border near Tijuana.

Categories: LaCostaValley · Property Values · Real Estate
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City of Carlsbad challenges High School District settlement

April 1, 2008 · No Comments

The City of Carlsbad challenged and reversed today’s High School District settlement.

In a surprisingly quick response to the High School District’s settlement - as reported on this blog in “School District settles middle school issue, will rebate LCV homeowners” - the City of Carlsbad unilaterally altered the financial terms of the settlement.

According to an anonymous special City representive who has dedicated extra time to this issue over the last year, “We have had our ears and eyes on this matter for some time, and have spent considerable staff time and large portion of our per diem expenses already.”

The City’s attorneys have ruled that the $53.4 million in fees which the High School District earmarked for the FONC/SOLD group will instead be transferred to City coffers.

The representative went on to explain, “The City is facing possible cutbacks from already-tight budgets. This windfall will almost get us caught up.”

The representative brought more to light about the use of the property, which will remain part of LCV HOA common areas. “We had an Arts committee out there recently and they determined that the location is perfect for the famous Carlsbad landmark that some people have derivisely referred to as ‘The Bars.’ Finally, we can once again stick this great work of art in the public eye.”

See also:

See also: State of California Overturns Decision by City of Carlsbad

Categories: LaCostaValley · hoa
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School District settles middle school issue, will rebate LCV homeowners

April 1, 2008 · No Comments

[Okay, the following was our little April Fool's day joke. Glad so many of you liked it and have a sense of humor, well most of you. Sorry if you're disappointed that Schwarzenegger won't be moving to La Costa Valley. We know this is a serious issue.]

In a surprising announcement, the High School District today reached settlement with homeowners who have been paying into Mello-Roos CFD 94-2. In addition, a parcel of land within the La Costa Valley (LCV) development which had been pegged for a middle school will be transferred to the LCV Homeowner’s Association.

“We simply made a math error,” said Peg Linch, School District Superintendent, in a prepared statement. She continued, “We had anticipated that middle-school enrollments would increase based on the many young children in La Costa Valley, along with irrational exuberance about continued population increase. Our consultants had assured us that life was so good in that area that families would get busy and have more children than average. Instead, those projections were optimistic.”

An advocacy group, sometimes going under the name FONC-Friends of North County and other times referred to as SOLD-Save Our Lawyers and Developers, claimed credit for the transaction.

A member of FONC/SOLD, who preferred to remain anonymous, disclosed “we were able to reach an agreeable formula which took into account the many hours we have spent on this single issue, in preparing and presenting meetings, creating graphics, keeping up with email, and other vital tasks.”

The total settlement of $55.9 million is made up of $7.6 million for accumulated Mello-Roos payments with interest, plus $48.3 million for the agreed-on value of the middle school property. The amount will be used to fund development of the land, provide rebates to LCV homeowners, and satisfy the financial claims of the FONC/SOLD group.

LCV Homeowners are expected to receive their rebates of approximately $1.3 million before the end of 2008, working out to $1,200 for each household. Another $1.3 million will be transferred to the LCV Homeowners’ Association for maintenance of the property and related reserves. The balance of the settlement, $53.4 million, will be transferred to the FONC/SOLD group for unspecified purposes.

An LCV homeowner who was interviewed shortly following the news release shared his sentiments. “Well, we never expected to get a nickel and everybody knew there would be no middle school, so at least it’s settled and behind us. Plus, now I’m getting $1,200 and won’t need to pay that $800 per year. So, it’s a win-win.”

Although plans for the vacant property have not been formally announced, unspecified sources have estimated that the settlement amount provided to the HOA might be enough to allow development of a mixed-use day and night moto-cross track, dog park, pet kennel, and compost-processing center.

See also: City of Carlsbad challenges settlement and State of California Overturns Decision by City of Carlsbad

Categories: Uncategorized
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